According to the ACCO, 1 in every 285 kids in the United States will be diagnosed with cancer before their 20th birthday. Because of that, it’s likely that you or someone you love knows someone impacted by childhood cancer.
We all want to help – but we don’t always know how. While donating and raising awareness are wonderful things to do, they don’t always feel impactful – especially when you have a specific person on your mind.
When you want to think outside the box and do more to really help families of children with cancer, turn to these ideas as a launching pad.
For families who don’t live close to world-class treatment centers, air travel is a tiring – and expensive – reality of seeking cancer treatment. If you have frequent flyer miles saved up, you can often donate them to your airline’s charity partners. American Airlines, for example, allows you to donate a minimum of 1,000 miles to charities like Children’s Flight of Hope, Mercy Medical, and the American Red Cross. Delta and United are among the airlines that allow the donation of miles to various charities.
Even if the family lives close to their child’s treatment center, a back-and-forth is inevitable. As gas prices are sky-high, the burden of frequent travel grows. Giving gas cards helps families already dealing with the financial strains of cancer treatment. Even if you don’t know an individual family to help, there are numerous organizations dedicated to helping these families with travel expenses: here is a list of charities and programs that help cancer patients with their travel expenses.
When you know a family of a childhood cancer patient personally, you can get more actively involved in supporting them. Insist on taking care of weekly errands that can sap their time and energy – pick up their groceries (either shop yourself or have them order online), prescriptions, and more. Help transport their children to and from school or sports.
Being both parent and primary caregiver for a cancer patient is draining – physically, mentally, and emotionally. Sometimes these parents just need a break! Offer to get their kids out of the house so they can have time to breathe, reconnect, and care for themselves. It can be hosting a sleepover, going to a park or activity center, or even just going out for ice cream. It might just be pro bono babysitting! Regardless, these small gestures go a long way.
You can also help in practical ways. For families facing something as daunting as a cancer journey, daily tasks can seem insurmountable. There might never seem like enough time to keep up with things. Over time, that adds up not only in inconvenience, but in damage to mental and emotional well-being. Depending on how well you know the family, you can help in different ways. If you’re less personally familiar with them, stick to things like mowing their lawn, preparing meals, and delivering groceries.
If you know the family well, pick specific days and times (rather than giving a blanket offer) to come and help with laundry, cleaning, and household maintenance.
Remember: just offering to help doesn’t cut it. Oftentimes, the family will feel uncomfortable asking for help directly, even when it has been offered. Instead, offer specific tasks and times. Don’t ask if you can do something – plan for when you can do it.
It costs nothing to listen. Too often we feel like we must be the ones who fix things. We want to say the magic words to make it all better. There’s nothing wrong with this instinct, but it is rarely what the families of cancer patients are looking for. They don’t want advice. They don’t want solutions or platitudes. They just want to be heard.
So listen.
We can look to the Jewish practice of sitting shiva to learn from. This is the custom of sitting with family who has just lost a loved one to help them process and move through their grief. Words are not necessary. Listening is. The key is that the mourners are not left alone. They are loved and supported.
For our part, we can choose to carry the frustrations, the grief, the fear, and the pain of families of kids with cancer. Allow yourself to be that sounding board – the person who offers support without feeling the need to “fix” everything. You may be surprised just how meaningful it can be.